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Category Archives: Benchslap

Judge’s Benchslap Provides Unique Resolution to Deposition Dispute.

01 Tuesday Jan 2019

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Benchslap, Depositions, Discovery, Humor, Judges

≈ Comments Off on Judge’s Benchslap Provides Unique Resolution to Deposition Dispute.

Tags

Benchslap, Discovery Disputes, Judge Nowlin, Kevin Underhill, Lowering the Bar

Parties Ordered to Conduct Deposition at State Line, Lowering the Bar, by Kevin Underhill

https://loweringthebar.net/2008/06/parties-ordered.html

Because we Oklahomans are totally fine with losing the Big 12 Championship to some other team whose name I can’t recall, this discovery dispute seemed understandable. [Sarcasm intended.] Everyone knows that, when it comes to discovery disputes, nothing is too outrageous, even if the Court adds football bragging rights to its Order.

Despite what I’m sure were sincere good faith efforts by both sides, neither could agree on the location for the corporate representative’s deposition – San Antonio, Texas, or Bentonville, Arkansas. Both refused to budge and had dug in their respective heels. The Court, when faced with an Opposed Motion for Protective Order by the Arkansas corporation, chose a unique resolution to make both parties happy. – CCE

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Six Judges Let The Benchslaps Fly.

19 Tuesday Jun 2018

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Acronyms, Appellate Law, Benchslap, Humor, Intellectual Property, Judges, Legal Ethics, Legal Writing, Oral Argument, Patent Law, Proofreading

≈ Comments Off on Six Judges Let The Benchslaps Fly.

Tags

Benchslap, Lawyerist.com©, Lisa Needham

Six Benchslaps to Brighten Your Day, by Lisa Needham, Lawyerist.com

https://lawyerist.com/six-benchslaps-will-brighten-day/

As Ms. Needham describes it, “[f]or the unfamiliar, benchslap originally referred to one judge snarking at another, but now refers to any time a member of the bench crushes an attorney with wit, rage, or both.” It is also an excellent example of what not to do. -CCE

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What Will Ignoring the Court Rules Get You? A Big Fat Benchslap.

08 Tuesday Aug 2017

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Bad Legal Writing, Benchslap, Brief Writing, Editing, Footnotes, Judges, Legal Writing, Motions, Plain Language, Proofreading, Readability

≈ Comments Off on What Will Ignoring the Court Rules Get You? A Big Fat Benchslap.

Tags

Court Rules, Editing, Findlaw, George Khoury, Legal Writing, William P. Statsky

Florida Judge Tosses Improperly Spaced Court Filing, by George Khoury, Esq., Strategist, The Findlaw Law Firm Business Blog  (with hat tip to William P. Statsky)

http://bit.ly/2uP9FyB

Mr. Khoury says that “[h]ell hath no fury like a Florida judge who receives an improperly formatted brief.” You better believe it. Why on earth would you ignore the format requirements in your court’s local rules? Folks, this just isn’t that hard.

The author of this motion for summary judgment thought the court would either ignore or not notice that the motion and supporting brief were spaced 1-1/2 lines rather than double-spaced. And who’s going to notice longer-than-usual footnotes? Really? Any judge or clerk whose job it is to read, read, and then read some more every dad-gum day.

Seriously, do you want to plow through heavy footnotes? Hands? Didn’t think so. Neither does your judge. Why risk alienating the person you are trying to convince? The stakes are too high to cling to a style of writing that sets you up to lose before anyone reads your motion or brief.

There are other, and much more effective ways, to trim a motion and brief. Editing is the key.

  1. Eliminate any unnecessary word.
  2. Remember that subject and verbs go together.
  3. Use short sentences.
  4. Delete all legalese. Yes, all of it. No excuses.
  5. You can always delete “in order.” Try it – it will not change the meaning in your sentence. These are an example of filler words that just take up space.
  6. Stop using phrases such as “brief of the plaintiff.” Write “plaintiff’s brief” instead.
  7. Never, never, never use long block quotations.
  8. Quote from a court opinion only when the court says it better than you can.

A quick search of this blog will give you tons of editing tips. I promise that you can get your point across with fewer words. It is not the number of words you use that count; it is what words you choose and how you say it. -CCE

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Legal Writing Benchslaps – Big Ouch!

05 Monday Jun 2017

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Bad Legal Writing, Benchslap, Judges, Legal Writing

≈ Comments Off on Legal Writing Benchslaps – Big Ouch!

How Poorly Drafted Pleadings and Bad Writing Can Hurt Your Client and You, Online Writing Center, Writing Tools, PennState Law

http://bit.ly/2rrqfEr

There are some basic rules of legal writing that are fatal to ignore. This post illustrates some of the most common errors that cost the author dearly. When the court goes to the trouble to benchslap the lawyer’s writing, take the court’s criticism to heart and avoid making the same writing mistakes.

This post also has a bonus. Look at the bar on the left to find legal writing exercises and answers. -CCE

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A Benchslap By Judge Gorsuch. And It’s A Really Good One, Too.

17 Monday Apr 2017

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in 10th Circuit Court of Appeals, 10th Circuit Practitioner's Guide, Appellate Judges, Appellate Law, Appellate Record, Benchslap, Citations to the Record, Immigration Law, Judges

≈ Comments Off on A Benchslap By Judge Gorsuch. And It’s A Really Good One, Too.

Tags

Above the Law (blog), Appellate Law, Benchslap, David Lat, Immigration, Justice Neil Gorsuch

Benchslap Of The Day: No More Mr. Nice Guy, by David Lat, Above The Law Blog

http://abovethelaw.com/2015/03/benchslap-of-the-day-no-more-mr-nice-guy/

It’s Monday, which makes it a good day for a good old-fashioned benchslap!

Our Judge for today’s benchslap is none other than newly appointed Justice Neil Gorsuch of the United States Supreme Court, back when he was at the United States District Court for the Tenth Circuit. Judge Gorsuch’s opinion is an excellent lesson on the basic elements of a successful appeal. An immigration lawyer ignored the Court’s local rules. A serious mistake, and a thorough benchslap. -CCE

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Appellate Court Benchslaps Trial Judge – Ouch.

25 Friday Nov 2016

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Appellate Judges, Benchslap, Judges

≈ Comments Off on Appellate Court Benchslaps Trial Judge – Ouch.

Tags

Above the Law (blog), Benchslap, Joe Patrice

Appeals Panel Rips Judge Over One-Minute Decision, by Joe Patrice, Above The Law Blog

http://abovethelaw.com/2016/10/appeals-panel-rips-judge-over-one-minute-decision/

The only thing more stinging than a satisfying benchslap is the cool, crisp bite of a sly insult. The understated quip can often accomplish so much more than the breathless broadside. For example, an opinion reversing the court below that signs off with, ‘next time, we assume you’ll do your job,’ boasts more devastating heft than anything Justice Scalia served up. It’s just so cold.

Continue reading →

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Citations In Footnotes? The Debate Rages On.

03 Saturday Sep 2016

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Benchslap, Citations, Footnotes, Judges, Legal Writing

≈ Comments Off on Citations In Footnotes? The Debate Rages On.

Tags

Above the Law (blog), Benchslap, Davit Lat, Judge James K. Bredar, Russ Guberman

Benchslap Of The Day: Don’t You Dare Put Citations In The Footnotes, by David aw LobLat, Above The Law Blog

http://abovethelaw.com/2016/08/benchslap-of-the-day-dont-you-dare-put-citations-in-the-footnotes/

In case you’ve missed it, there is controversy in the legal writing world about whether citations belong in the text or in the footnotes. People in both camps feel strongly about this. These people do not see a lot of gray. You are either doing it right or you’re not. I suspect this Judge has similar inclinations. -CCE

Nobody puts baby in the corner. And nobody puts citations in the footnotes — at least not in this federal judge’s court.

Via the Twitter feed of Ross Guberman, a leading expert on legal writing, comes this benchslap from Judge James K. Bredar (D. Md.) . . . .

Continue reading →

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Gender Discrimination During Deposition Earns Judge’s Benchslap.

16 Saturday Jan 2016

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Attorney Discipline, Benchslap, Depositions, Discovery, Judges, Legal Ethics, Professional Civility, Rules of Professional Responsibility

≈ Comments Off on Gender Discrimination During Deposition Earns Judge’s Benchslap.

Tags

Above the Law (blog), Benchslap, Depositions, Gender Discrimination, Staci Zaretsky

Lawyer Receives Stern Benchslap And Amazing Sanction For Sexist Deposition Comment, by Staci Zaretsky, Above The Law Blog 

http://bit.ly/1RNcs34

As we’ve thoroughly documented in these pages, women who practice law are often subjected to demeaning and degrading comments from their male colleagues, for no other reason than because they’re women. One federal judge had finally had enough of this type of disrespectful behavior, so he took a lawyer to task for making a sexist remark during a deposition. . . .

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Failure To Follow Court Rules Earned This Fed Up Benchslap.

23 Monday Nov 2015

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Appellate Law, Bad Legal Writing, Benchslap, Brief Writing, Citations, Court Rules, Courts, Issues On Appeal, Judges, Legal Writing

≈ Comments Off on Failure To Follow Court Rules Earned This Fed Up Benchslap.

Tags

Above the Law (blog), Appellate Law, Benchslap, Brief Writing, Court Rules, Kathryn Rubino

A Lawyer Way Out Of Her League Gets Benchslapped By Frustrated Judge, by Kathryn Rubino, Above The Law Blog

http://tinyurl.com/o9hk847

The case did not seem suspicious. A commercial painter claimed he had not been paid for work hired by a building manager. The lawyer took the painter’s case. Unfortunately, under oath, her client admitted that he had faked his evidence with forged invoices.

No one was surprised when the trial court imposed sanctions. The surprise came when the lawyer appealed the case with a badly written brief. The lawyer only made it worse when she submitted her corrected brief to the Court. The judge’s response is a classic benchslap. -CCE

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Perfect Benchslap For Redaction Running Amuck.

08 Saturday Aug 2015

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Benchslap, Court Orders, Federal Judges, Judges, Legal Writing, U.S. District Courts

≈ Comments Off on Perfect Benchslap For Redaction Running Amuck.

Tags

Above the Law, Benchslap, Joe Patrice, Judge Charles Breyer, Legal Writing, Redaction

Judge Trolls Lawyers Without Saying Anything At All, by Joe Patrice, Above The Law

http://abovethelaw.com/2015/08/judge-trolls-lawyers-without-saying-anything-at-all/

Joe beat me to it. Many thanks to Jessica L. Craft at Holden & Carr for the heads’ up. -CCE

Judge Charles Breyer proves that a redaction can be worth a thousand words. . . .

Continue reading →

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Judge’s Benchslap for Missing E-Filing Deadline By Three Minutes.

13 Saturday Jun 2015

Posted by Celia C. Elwell, RP in Benchslap, Calendar/Docketing, E-Filing, Judges, Law Office Management, Legal Technology

≈ Comments Off on Judge’s Benchslap for Missing E-Filing Deadline By Three Minutes.

Tags

Above the Law, Benchslap, Brief Writing, Deadlines, E-Filing, Judges, Staci Zaretsky

Judge Shames Lawyers Over Midnight Filings In Awesomely Sarcastic Order, by Staci Zaretsky, Above The Law

http://tinyurl.com/oeld5yg

Thanks to the advent of electronic filing, lawyers get to work nearly 24 hours a day. You’re not expected to work that much, of course, but your firms certainly wouldn’t mind it if you did. Got a motion due at midnight? No problem! You’re overworked and you’ve got a million other things on your plate, so putting one filing on the backburner can’t hurt. After all, you can just furiously write it the night it’s due, and click a few buttons to get it filed by 11:59 p.m. But for some, until the last minute will come back to bite you in the ass. . . .

Continue reading →

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